An Epic Fail, or why I need a walking foot

I got that big piece of velvet in seafoam green color with all of that free fabric from Alicia. My original thought was "om nom nom" and I knew I would make a jacket out of it, a Cordova jacket! I wanted to do a trial run with the pattern and this fabric would be perfect!

Andrew saw the fabric and said ew. I ignored him. 

 Sadly, he was right. Just for the record, I didn't even finish it. After I put in the zipper, I could tell it was a lost cause. So it is not hemmed at all.

Problem one: Velvet. I was like "No, man, I got this." I made a velvet dress before, it'll be fine... Yeah, thinking back, I rush-made a really shoddy red dress for the last day of school before Xmas break. Seriously, go look at it. Such a turd. So since that was my sum total of velvet experience...

Solution: I need a walking foot for my machine. I tried my best, but the pieces would get fed through at different paces and every. single. piece. was. off. I did find a picture online and looked through all of my miscellaneous feet, but I don't have one. Sooo.....something to buy soon.

Oh lawd!

 Problem two: Style + fabric, use some logic please.

The Cordova pattern is for a nice, slim jacket with some detailing and a zipper front. There have been some very good versions that I have seen around the interwebs. Trisha made nice purple one and Tasia made nice tweed one. Everything about the fabric, color and style is all wrong; the sleeves look absurd. It looks like some poorly done costume for an un-researched movie set in the 1800s, minus the not-yet-invented zipper. I am frowning just looking at the pictures. Sooooo ugly.

Solution: Sometimes it is necessary to sit down and actually think about if a pattern and a fabric will

LOL I know!

 Problem three: the zipper. Seriously, if you can't find a zipper that matches (which was impossible at Jo-Ann, the only place I looked) you should not use a random, white, separating one from your stash. Plus it was a little too long, so I cut an inch off the top. The top. So now there is no metal stopper, and the tab can just shoot off into the atmosphere. When I realized this, after I had sewn it in (unevenly, due to no walking foot), I just quit. We're done here, folks.

Solution: Find a damn zipper that matches!

Saggy McDroopertons

Plus,I think the fit is too baggy in general even though I made my usual size 2. It will definitely need some sizing down if I make it again.

Now that it's finally starting to feel like Spring, who cares about jackets!

Feel free to say whatever mean things you like about this wad of crap! I have zero attachment to it and it will be going in my freecycle fabric scrap bag. Oh no wait, I already did that. Haha!

Vogue Dress Meh... V 1287

This dress is just so meh. The fabric is cool, but on my skin it looks so gross. I need to stop buying fabric with a beige background. I thought the pleat detail would be cool, but it just looks like a shapeless bundle of crap. I finished this at least two weeks ago, but was unmotivated to take pictures.

 The front: meh. The back: meh. Meh!

 Close-up? Meh. You can't even see the details. Also, it has no closures and is meant to just pull over your head, but it is like trying to crawl through a small tube.

The sketch looks nice though. Oh Vogue and your false promises! It is nicely made, though. Maybe I will sell it on etsy.

Two wins and a FAIL

Let's start with a win:

Look at my awesome tarte aux poires, aka pear pie. I complete stole the decorating idea from Meg and it turned out great! 

 Win 2: Emma is going to go with me on Thursday to the sketchy estate sale. The rest of you (Meg) should skip work and come too! Email me at mollysewsblog [at] gmail [dot] com if you want to...

Win 3: Adorable Andrew and his trench coat got chosen for Burdastyle's Best of November! I am super excited!

and now....

for the EPIC fail...

I present to you...

Dad's Irish tweed cap version 2...

Yeah, I know. WTF. Who even knows what is going on up in here. So frightening. When (and if) I ever sort this out I am going to make my first tutorial so that no one has to suffer like me (and your eyes). I even drew sketches and discussed it with Andrew...he is good at the logic puzzles of sewing.

I'm going to start version 3 this afternoon before work. Wish me luck, it seems I desperately need it!

The Monkey Paw!

Here's the promised pictures of the Thanksgiving Glove Dyeing Debacle. In the future, I will try not to be a giant moron and dye LEATHER gloves in HOT water on the stove. Andrew was making me fun of me and my thought process yesterday in the car and I was laughing until I couldn't breathe. If I had thought about it for one second, I think I wouldn't have two monkey paws.

Now, I don't know if they give you wishes, but I hope so!

(For anyone who has never read the short story, here is a link.)

Not only did thy shrink to child-size, they also dried rock hard with twisted fingers. Shockingly, neither Andrew nor the dog enjoyed being poked with the monkey paw. T-Rex tried to bite off the rigid, mutant fingers with no success.
Here are two tiny bell pepper from the garden. Andrew said they tasted gross, but the dog and I enjoyed them.
I also hemmed both of my Swirl dresses. I will wear them Monday and Tuesday and then post pictures. I bought flannel for my coat underlining and washed it, so I will start cutting those out today too.

I amaze myself

..and not in a good way. I finally finished my other pink and green tablecloth.

I was having a terrible time, because the thread kept snapping and I could not figure out why. Was it the ruffler? no. Was it the bobbin and shuttle? No. Was it the tension? No. Was it the needle point? No.

I am an idiot? Yes. Do you see where this is going?

You see, I put the needle in backwards! I was convinced that the flat side had to face right. Finally, after hours of torment and frustration, I looked at the diagram on page ten.

Oh, to the left.

Duh.

Anyways, the tablecloths are done, and the ruffler is a great attachment when operator error isn't bringing me down!

Please tell me other people do dumb stuff like this, and I'm not the ONLY one!! :)

Filled with Hate, or Why to make a muslin

Before I begin moping and ranting, I got to photostalk the awesome birds again. Doesn't it look like a freaky dino-bird? There are two of them, as well.

This is my pattern, one of the 25 cent ones. I really liked the one-button jacket. It looks so sleek in the (lying, lying) drawing. Remember, this was my cheap red cotton muslin to decide if it was worth cutting into my $30 a yard black wool.
More dollar shoes. These are more practical and less cute, but still ok for work.
Here is how my final project makes me feel:

So let's try to ignore the Barbara Bush, power suit-1980s feel of the look, and look at how badly it fits and how FRUMPY I look!!!

Gross.

In this picture, you can see how the collar does NOT lay flat at all, but you can look at the chest area. My boobs look like deflated balloons! Oh the horror.

Close-up of the ugly collar.
The skirt back fits nicely.
The front darts either need to be longer, or I need to taper them more finely. At this point, I was so cranky I spent about 35 seconds on them. See hoe the darts go through the waistband? Classy.
Final thoughts:

The skirt is okay. I like the general fit, but I need to draft a curved waistband for it, which I don't know how to do, but can probably figure out. As is, I added darts to the waistband, which is really tacky and lazy. I also want it to curve in more towards my knees. All of that is fix-able.

The jacket is crap. It looks frumpy, and big, and very very ill-fitting. Ugh. I wasted time sewing this, which annoys me, and it sucks. Definitely not cutting into the nice wool for this jacket. I don't like how the sleeves are twice as long as the jacket. It makes me look like a monkey.

So, be as cruel as you want in the comments. I will only cry a little. But, like I tell the students, you have to give me a reason why or your opinion is meaningless. You can't just say "vomit", you need to say "It makes me vomit because..." Or, better yet, any advice on how to make this less hideous?

La robe de la petite maison du prairie or The Little House on the Prairie dress aka EPIC FAIL

This is my pattern. It is a 14, which is a little big for me. I liked the scalloped waist.

Now, due to the ridiculously busy, medium-size floral print I used, that detailing is nearly invisible. Can you even see the 20 pleats? no! Now I understand why people say quilter's cotton = looks homemade. I have learned my lesson.

Between the print, the high neck, and the long sleeves, I look like I jumped off a covered wagon in 1855. Boo! (I am pinching in about 2 inches in the back in this picture)

Faux happiness

Sad and frumpy? Oui!

If I ever wear it, I will make it into short sleeves and wear a sweater over it to break up the print. Not this stretched out sweater, but you get the idea.

Pattern: cute, but would need to be scaled down a few inches if I ever make it again.

Fabric: -15 out of 100

Little House on the Prairie role in my future? Possibly, I can bring my own costume!